Try to Forget
by boqlover
Summary: After Bart died, what did Jack make Blair do to get Chuck home? Will he be able to help her forget? Rated M for a reason! Reviews are appreciated!


Blair was nervously pacing her entryway looking alternately at the street leading to her front door and the elevator. She wore a simple slip, her hair tangled and her face bare. On one of her paths she glanced up and caught sight of herself in the mirror. She quickly closed her eyes and retreated back to the dark of the living room. She sat on the stairs gripping the banister for support. _Where is he? _She thought frantically. _I never should have trusted him. He has no idea where Chuck is and he's not on his way home and I did… this… for nothing._

She looked up forcing the tears back. She had to stay strong. If Chuck really was coming back she needed to be strong enough for the both of them. She heard the faint ding and sweeping sound of her elevator opening. Chuck stumbled out as though he had been leaning on the door for support. He stumbled and fell to his knees."Chuck." cried Blair out of relief "Thank god…"

"Bl- Blair?" he said looking up at her his eyes glassy. He had to concentrate on focusing on her face but it was still blurred.

"Come on." She said hastily pulling him out of the light flooding from the elevator into the entryway. She tried to help him to her room but he collapsed into the same place she had been sitting moments ago. "It's ok." She said pushing his hair out of his eyes. "It's ok you're here and you're safe. I'm right here. Blair's here." His clothes were rumpled as though he hadn't shaved in days and the smell of alcohol and something else sickly sweet hovered around him. "Do you want anything? Water?" she said hopelessly. He nodded and she stood. "I- I have some clothes if you want to change." She pointed to the blue shirt hanging in front clothes she had ready for him hanging in front of the bathroom.

"Thanks… I'll uh-" He stood slowly finally regaining his balance and began to walk towards the clothes.

"I'll be right back." She ran to the kitchen ducking determinedly not looking at the mirrors.

She stood in front of the fridge watching the stream of water tumble the ice cubes over and over as they hurtled around the glass. One cracked and she flinched as it echoed in here head. _Tell me you like it, _a voice said as another crack this time only in memory.

She pulled the glass away so quickly it sloshed onto the floor. She closed her eyes gripping the glass and placing her hand on the cool marble to steady herself. She inhaled deeply and tried to release it in a calm steady stream but the quaking in her chest made that impossible. She opened her eyes and walked back to the entryway.

Chuck had shed his rumpled clothes and was now trying to fasten his new shirt but his fingers fumbled over the small white buttons. Blair set the glass down on a small table and helped him finish.

His face and chest still had droplets of water hanging to them where he had clearly tried to wash himself in her sink. She brushed away the ones clinging to his chest resisting the urge to pull him against her but unable to keep herself from running her hand down the length of his chest. He shivered and she quickly fastened the rest of the buttons. "Thanks." He said his voice quiet and dry.

"No problem." She stroked his face to push away the water but also to reassure herself he was really there. She felt his strong cheekbones and closed her eyes as her hand brushed his square jaw. She felt him grip her wrist and she opened her eyes to see him staring straight at her. She quickly looked down and handed him his glass of water. He took it from her swallowing deeply. Blair watched him truing to ignore the nerves still gripping her chest.

"Blair why are you doing this?" he said his voice clearer.

"Because you need help." She said still not looking at him. "And I can help you."

"The things I said- You should hate me."

"You didn't mean it." She said her hand stroking his face. His breath caught silently and he gripped her waist for support and just to be touching her again. Her eyes flickered up to his in the dim light and she felt warmth spread through her, radiating from where his hands rested. He pulled her closer so they were only inches apart and her hands slid to his chest. "I-" she said trying to keep her thoughts coherent. "I missed you. I was worried you… might not come back." She bit her bottom lip to keep herself from saying to much and his eyes darted to her pale pink lips. "I-" she started again and stopped trying to think. She leaned in closely and kissed him as softly as she could. His breath stopped and for one second she thought he would pull away. Instead one hand slid to the small of her back to keep them both steady.

She felt knees buckle and her hands clutch and his chest. She had to be strong she thought desperately. She could let her own desires overshadow what he needed right now. But god, what she wished he would do. She wanted him to press into her exploring her mouth, leaving trails of kisses over her neck and collar bone erasing what had happened.

_What had happened...His hands gripping her wrists tightly, pressing them into the wall. His hand closed around her neck as he hissed in her ear, 'You want him home don't you?'_ She pulled herself away from his gentle lips but their hands still held each other.

"What is it?" he said looking at her concernedly.

"We're not thinking clearly right now." She said her breath shallow and her voice shaking from desire and terror. "I'm not at least." She couldn't help herself. She pressed back into him this time her whole body wrapped around his. His hands tangled themselves in her hair and held her waist. They both moaned as their tongues moved softly together their familiar rhythm returning. Blair stumbled, their lips not parting, into and fell into the wall behind her. Chuck braced his hand on either side of her shoulders as she kissed him again and again.

Help me forget, she thought. Remind me what its like… Her hands moved to the bottom button of hi shirt and she undid them all. She pressed her silk clad body into his bare chest and moaned at his warmth.

"Blair…" said Chuck pulling himself away. "You don't want this. You don't mean it. You just feel bad for me because my dad's dead. I'm fucked up right now and you just want to fix me." Blair shook her head fervently trying to pull him back but he pushed her away. "Blair. We don't work. We've tried and all it did was make us play more games. All we did was play those stupid games and now we both lose."

"No, that's not true. At first it was just the intrigue, hiding it from everyone, the thrill of almost getting caught. But when everyone knew that went away. Look, we were both stupid and both cruel and we both made mistakes." She wrapped her arms around him looking up at his face. His eyes were shut but she hoped he was listening.

"Before Lily called from the hospital, when we were dancing together you know we were… something was happening. We let our guard down. We forgot the games for a few minutes and we were happy. We felt it, we both did. If we could be like that, just us without games or rules, we could work."

Chuck opened his eyes looking straight at Blair for the first time that night. He saw her looking at him but it wasn't the Blair he was used to seeing. It wasn't the smug look that she wore at school. It wasn't the disgust she wore when he used to talk about his conquests. It wasn't the hurt look when he had left her broken. It wasn't the angry look she wore when he insulted her.

This face was new to him. It was open, no potting clicking away. It was asking him to be happy with her, to let everything that had happened go and to just try to… be. "I don't know if I can do that." Blair closed her eyes biting her lip. A tear squeezed out from her closed eyes. "I don't know if I can do that," he repeated lifting her face to his. "But I wouldn't wanna try it with anyone else." She opened her eyes wide looking up at him.

"Does that mean you want to try?" she said hopefully. He answered by kissing her softly. She leaned into him eagerly then pulled away only a few inches barely keeping herself from devouring him all at once. Her breath was ragged and she was shaking softly. He bit his lip smiling as his hand held her face his jaw stroking her cheek. She closed her eyes trying to steady her breath. His other hand moved up to cup her face and pull her close but she flinched away from him.

"I'm- I'm sorry… I shouldn't have- It's way to soon for- I'll go…" He stood stumbling over his heavy feet.

"No it's not that." She said stepping away from the wall and gripping him. "I- You just brushed a- sore spot, that's all." He stopped and looked at her out of the dim of her empty living room and into the bright spotlighting in the elevator bank. He saw her entire body, or what skin was revealed was covered in large purple bruises. Even her delicate face had a smattering of them across her cheekbone where he had stroked her and her jaw line.

She realized he was staring at her injuries and quickly backed out of the light. He gripped her arm gently but firmly and pulled her back into the light. She looked down but he put his hand under her chin lifting it up. He looked at her face his fingers brushing as lightly as he could over them, but she still flinched. "Blair…" he said looking over her battered body, "What happened? Who did this to you?"

"It's nothing." She said trying to back away.

"It's not nothing Blair! There's not an inch of you not covered in bruises. Who did this to you?" '_Who do you really want?' He growled at her. _

'_Yo- you.' She stuttered. His pressed deeper inside her and she clenched her jaw holding back a scream._

'_Say my name.' he said. 'Say it like you want me, like you need me."_

She shook her head."It doesn't matter. You're here and that's all that matters now." She wrapped around him burying her face in his strong chest inhaling his scent, drinking it in until she felt her lungs would burst.

"We're not letting this go." He said pulling her away. "Who. Did. This?" She looked away from him her throat closing.

"Do you know who got you home?" she said her voice wavering.

"My uncle Jack or at least his guys… He's probably sniffing around for my shares of the company. He'll do anything to get what he wants..." Chuck looked at her confusedly. "Why?"

"I… I found Jack when I was looking for you. He said he could find you as long as I provided him with money. Then he told me he found you in Thailand but he wouldn't bring you home until I made a… a better offer. I offered him almost half a million but, that wasn't… what he had in mind." She looked away starting to shake. "It was the only way I could make sure you were home safe. I didn't know what else to do. He said if I tried to get someone else to bring you home he would make sure you stayed lost. I didn't have any other choice."

"I don't understand, Blair what did Jack make you do?" he said the sleep and residual drugs clouding his comprehension.

"Don't make me say it please…" she said her throat closing.

"Just tell me, Blair. We're starting over we need to talk if we want to make this work. Just tell me-"

"I slept with him!" she screamed, crumpling down gripping the banister. She sat on the steps sobbing clutching her chest. "I'm sorry and god, I was doing it for you and he kept saying if I didn't then he would- He just kept grabbing me, biting me and –" Her voice grew weak. "All I could think was I was doing it for you. That it was the only way. When he threw me down, when he hit me, , forced me on my knees, pulled my hair-" her voice broke. "Please don't leave again."

Chuck stood up backing away from her his hand running through his hair then raking back to press the heels of his palm into his eyes. He looked back at her his eyes red, his hands shaking. She watched his pacing, his path erratic and stilted. "You- you slept with him." He said trying to keep his voice steady. It wasn't a question.

"I didn't mean it-"

"Don't explain it or qualify it, just answer yes or no. Did you sleep with Jack?"

"Yes." She said not able to look at him.

"And you did it for me? To bring me home?"

"Yes."

"And he was the one who gave you all these bruises."

"Yes."

Chuck stopped and looked at her. He bent down and looked her in the face. She finally looked up at him and saw his eyes searching her. He put his hands on her arms looking at her closely. "Please say something, Chuck."

He pulled her into him stroking her hair. She sat there stunned for a moment but then began to cry silently into his shoulder. "I'm so sorry, Blair. I shouldn't have come to your room like that then left like that."

"Your dad had just died; no one was expecting you to be thinking rationally. You needed me and you came here. Somehow I knew you would and I knew I would be here for you."

"Even after what I said… or didn't say." He said looking away from her.

"Don't even think about it." She said. "We don't need to talk about that now." She stroked his hair of his forehead. He looked up and gently held her hand kissing her wrist.

**Comments are appreciated highly! I'll write more soon!**


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